7.18.2002

You get upset because i never 'talk' to you, you say that i never share my feelings, my thoughts, my opinions. Maybe it is because i'm just simply not that kind of girl. Did you ever think of that? hmm? Well i'm not, i am not opinionated, i can't share my feelings or my thoughts for multiple reasons. There is no eaasy answer, i could say that i'm too shy, or that i just can't because i was too afraid of it coming back on me before. But that, that just isn't it... i don't know what it is...i'd like too, but i can't. We never go anywhere, we never do anything, i used to be content with that, yesterday however, i just wasn't. I'll admit, we did have a couple of conversations yesterday, i did find out a few things that normally i wouldn't have. Yet some of them, they just bothered me for unexplained reasons...don't worry i still love you, we're not through yet...that has to be a mutual decision, and it isn't happening yet...i love you now and i always will...yet sometimes i wonder what else is out there, i haven't had that much experience, i only dated two other guys before you, one back in 8th grade and the other only for a few weeks...i can't help but wonder what i'm missing out on, (don't worry, i don't plan on acting any of this out) today's Greg's birthday...happy birthday to him...i know you'll never see this...that is for the best, i know i'll never explain this to you either I can almost see it know, if i let any of this out to you then things will be misunderstood, taken the wrong way and we'll break up...and i don't want that...lots of love...kk

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